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How to deal with the 'pressure' of online chat in a long distance relationship if you don't feel like talking?
This is a question my nephew, who is in college now, emailed me the other day. He has been in love with a girl for over a year. Soon after they met, she had to move to France to begin her studies. He wrote:

"Today we live in a world where instant communication is the norm and is free: Instant messaging, Skype, webcams, etc. This past year, chatting and using the webcam have been daily rituals. On one hand, this makes me feel closer to her. But on the other hand, I’m almost always at a computer, whether it be my own or my computer at university. This means that for me instant messaging is always a possibility. And whereas this may seem like a good thing, I often feel I am supposed to be chatting whenever she is online, especially since our time zones don't leave that many available hours open. Of course it doesn't help if I am delaying university work, so whenever I don't feel like chatting, I felt I couldn’t use the excuse of having to work because I simply wasn’t working."

Please give your serious opinions on how to deal with this delicate situation.
Many thanks!
He would need to set his priorities right. He should understand that he needs to get his college work done before he spends time on the computer chatting with her.
It's quite long but please read it. What does this mean?
Well, I'm still friends with my ex boyfriend 3 months after the split. He is always starting conversations on msn and he's always very sweet, compliments me a lot. He started seeing a girl a few weeks ago, but he said to me from the start that he couldn't stop thinking about me and he didn't trust her. A mutual friend saw them at college and apparently they'd walk right past each other without acknowledging the other's presence. Last week my ex told me he was going to end it because he wasn't happy. It didn't happen for a few days so I assumed he didn't mean it.

Well anyway, I went away on holiday on Monday. I got a text from him that day telling me he'd ended the relationship. Then he asked if I'd meet him after my holiday. I said I would. He was texting me again the next day telling me he really cared about me. Didn't hear from him for the rest of the week. I got home yesterday evening. When he got home from work, he came online and greeted me straight away, saying 'yay, you're home!'. That was around 11pm and we chatted constantly until 2am. At some point in the conversation we switched on our webcams. He said I looked amazing, even though I actually looked really tired lol. Anyway, he asked again if I'd meet him soon and I just asked him to let me know when he was free. I was tired so I told him I was going to bed. He said goodnight, winked at me and blew me kisses on the webcam. When I laughed he told me how beautiful I looked.

Now I really don't know what's going on. He told me the reason he left me was because he didn't love me anymore and yet I know for a fact that he gave his friends a different reason. What does this all mean? My friends and I both think he's acting as though he's interested. But I really don't know what to think, I can't exactly ask him. What do you think?
This actually happens a lot. Someone makes a rash decision and breaks up with you because he suddenly thinks he likes someone else when this is not true. I think he is in love with you again, or maybe he's only there for the physical part. So you should wait out and see what happens with that guy.

If you think he's only looking at your body, keep your distance. If you think he's really in to you, try to reflect on your relationship and how you felt about him back then. If that was a really good feeling, then think about getting back together!

Good Luck!

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